Do you need to know what’s going to happen most of the time? Do you like to be prepared and dislike uncertainty? Do you like to be the boss? Why do we develop these needs? There is nothing right or wrong about these traits, it’s more about knowing that you may have a coping style of control.

This can be different from being a controlling person for some people. Controlling people attempt to control others often unknowingly. Someone who uses control as a coping style can also be a controlling person or just focus obsessively on controlling themselves.

We learn the need for control as a young child. You may have felt helpless and had no control and/or there was no order just chaos in your life. Consequently, you then decided in your wee mind to take control as it feels too unsafe.

Now as an adult, it’s about asking yourself “is this working for me now in my life?” Or is it creating issues in relationships?